cold water β€’ lights βœ¨

I won’t say that this is the last lap but we’re close to it β€” some things feel like a drag but as the day gets nearer, I still wonder if I’m doing the right thing. don’t get mistaken, but you will always contemplate situations.. after all, I’ve never been the type of person to settle regardless but I guess, I could be wrong too.

and we’re halfway thru January, it feels like it was only yesterday I caught the fireworks (which was a hassle! no more please) and now here we are! #2o17BTB, you all ready?

some random snippets of what went on during the last few months β€”

went to JB to fix my hair, got it in an ash tone and I luv it! (you can tell by the number of videos of shiok sendirian I posted hahaha!) will be back next month to change to another color (still thinking of either silver/grey or another ashy tone like Idk, pinks and purples? I kid, I kid… or am I? 😜)

I also had eyelashes extension done and they’re helllaaaa amazing!! not only do I save (plenty) of time getting ready, esp in the morning before I go to work but I don’t have to use any eyeliner or mascara and to me, that just speaks a lot haha but of course I do miss wearing eyeliner!! oh you know, the whole cat eye look urgh shrugs but man, I take eyelashes extension any day thou! and also, when you go on a holiday, it just cuts down your time into half :p

(excuse the background of the “Happy Birthday”) celebrated K’s birthday and well, the photos are not in order and I cannot be bothered to adjust ’em haha. ’twas a good one!! and the boy even shed tears of joy – I guess he didn’t believe that his friends would turn up as he have not seen them for months and was “complaining” to me during dinner that he’s been too busy and woooola! I’m glad, THAT plastered some sort of smiles on his face πŸ™‚

I’ve also been obsessed with collecting more of JS’S lipsticks but as much of a lipstick hoarder, there are some shades that do not appeal to me at all so I’m still considering! but if you like/love liquid lipsticks — this is the brand you should really try. no problem with reapplication nor will it dry/flake (unlike ColourPop!) it’s definitely worth the money~

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the invitation cards have finally arrive and gurrrrrl, they’re so pretty! received plenty of compliments already and I’m secretly happy! HAHA! I got 450 cards @ 7o cents each from @soireebliss if you girls are interested! COMPLETE customization **even down to the font!! I like cause I’m very anal about the font haha) (you can view from her portfolio and tweak to your liking)

file_000efa477f8-03b9-4f7b-be18-63074ec689e5-1682-000002bcc36dca09_tmp932da558-b276-469a-aff5-218d801f5b88-1682-000002bc62ff9bdb_tmp(photos from RH/Bridal)

as you all know, my parents are handling (and paying) for both decor and catering and my mum showed me those photos and they’re not bad?! I mean, I’m okay with those kind of concept hahahaha (free kan, so go je) but mine will be of White/Gold/Cream palette and I leave it to my mum to decide the rest.

still finding suitable “plates” (well not really plates la, but some kind of trays thingy…) because I am having a donut tower!!! woooohoo! I mean, I’ve already decided since the day I got engaged.. but hey! this is really happening!! LMAO excuse my excitement, but I luvvv donuts – planing to get ’em from Krispy Kreme cause the glazed/original ones are sooo good?! and also because I don’t eat cakes or cupcakes or wtv (except for Ondeh-Ondeh cake from a SPECIFIC baker HAHA) and… who doesn’t eat donuts anyway?! (to reduce wastage)

K and I have also bought our furniture from IKEA, we’re just left with a few items and we’re done! we (more like him and his dad) painted the room over the weekend and the room just looks way bigger (especially with a fresh white coat) can’t wait to see the final results. but sad that I have to move from one place to another often (Hougang to MacPherson and vice versa) which means I have to get more (personal) items esp make up related hahahaha but it’s alright.

we have yet to go for ROMM “interview” which will prolly be in 2 weeks’ time, we don’t have to make any sorts of appt right? can just walk-in yes?

first fitting with bridal (Peti Solek) was great, ALL the wedding gowns I picked were at one glance and I only picked ONE each (you can pick two and choose one, and yes you can view their whole collection and pick any — just ask them for the price difference!) and… we upgraded two outfits haha, well I chose two and K chose one (he was soΒ adamant and didn’t want to try or pick any other for his choice!!) and with that, I cannot gain any weight or whatsoever because the dresses are soooo tight and fitted just nicely HAHA urgh shrugs.

other than that, I think we’ve pretty much covered most things, the rest all can do later I guess. just need to finalize itinerary for the day itself and also our holidays!! woop woop.

till then, till I become Mrs Nash!

 

a hundred and five

we’re a tad close to a two-digit countdown and I’m feeling pretty okay β€” like too okay that people keep asking me if I’m ready. well, I don’t think I will ever be but I’ll manage. I believe I do best managing things on my own. there are pros and cons with wanting to do everything by myself that in the end, the only person I seem to kid is me. lulz, how ironic. 

anyway! so far, I’ve (yes, again me)  managed to complete registration ROMM online β€” just need to find a suitable time to come down to the place itself *shrugs, the horror of working shift hours and your dad isn’t* and what do you know, I found someone to do my wedding cards. if you read my old entries, you’ll see that one particular card maker was in my list but well… that was about a year ago. haha clearly my taste have changed. it turns out this someone is an old friend during my very active online social escapades, such a coincidence! can’t wait to see how the cards will look like because it is completely customizable and I have a rough idea of how I want it to be and hopefully she’ll be able to execute it! 

in the next two weeks we’ll reach the 3 months’ mark which means my parents can go ahead with booking the MPH. they have also semi-finalized the catering/food and I’m honestly gasping cause it’s like 11/12 dishes? I kid you not. my mum is keeping herself occupied creating all sorts of DIY (sometimes I wonder who’s the one getting married cause I’m such a lazy person and I’m someone who can’t be bothered with little things hahahahaha) like she’s already done the flower bouquet, money box, my trays and some other stuffs which l honestly do not keep track with. HAHA. 

talking about trays, it’ll just be one tray of bunga rampai and another to hold wedding ring and/or duit hantaran (for my fiancΓ©). yup it’s that simple and I’m sure on the day itself people are gonna ask why there aren’t other stuffs but who cares, it’s my wedding after all. 😏 and we have finally bought our wedding rings and that’s one (burden) off the list! got his @ Bulgari and… I am completely and utterly in luv w/ mine, really. its customized but it is exactly how I want it to be β€” 1.5 carot, split band which is engraved with stones back, front. it’s hard to imagine (or take a photo!) but damn, can’t wait for the day to show you alls. 😍

we also have a fitting in the next 2 weeks and I’ve yet to find heels! well, I do have one pair but I do not own any in nude/beige color so need to get that off my list too. y’know sometimes it feels like I’ve so many stuffs to do but I’m not exactly sure what they are. I’ve been trying to put together an English playlist (on Spotify) for wedding but all I have are like of, The Chainsmokers, Maroon 5 etc but then again, it’s my wedding right? πŸ™„

December coming soon and that means I have to rearrange my space and revamp everything which is going to be a chore but let’s see how it goes? 

December also means that fiancΓ©’s (24th) birthday (also the last single moment) is coming! gasp. should I pretend like I don’t know anything? will it work? HAHA. (hi if you’re reading this πŸ˜…)

wedding planning aside, work has been so far so good. 3 months soon and being confirmed! well, I definitely like here better than before β€” for so many reasons. like ykno, the staff welfare is just there? and maybe I have to deal with difficult guests but most are generally nice so that’s alright. can’t wait to get a break next year, really. flight and Villa for Bali are all booked! left the days’ activities planning to my husband-tobe because I need to give him something to do or else its up to me hahahahahaha. we also randomly booked a trip to KL in the weekend for a short (food) getaway. haha! sempat gila. also cox AirAsia was having a cheap promo the other day $100 for 2 pax two-way. intially the plan was to go with K’s sibling and the gf but sadly he gotta go NS. 

will definitely plan more trips~ and now that Trump has won the president election, I guess USA will be for another time (so glad I went last year). and also have to plan for more important thing like… where do we stay in the long run after the wedding. buying a house is not exactly the problem… it’s where that I cannot seem to grasp. 

we can’t have the best of both worlds can we? 

finally off day tmro and going to JB to fix my hair (goodbye blonde but hello new color 😁) and also to eat ShellOut! so excited. 

ok goodbye for now!

180 days β€” wait what?

exactly 6 months to go and so much has changed: my birthday came and past, I had two weeks of rest which I needed so badly and the biggest change so far!!! if you read my previous post, I was talking abt going thru appraisal regarding my decisions after my wedding and what do you know? I made my choice to leave. it was hard really due to circumstances I couldn’t change β€” I’ve been holding the same job/designation for 3 years with NO opportunity to further grow myself (trust me, I’ve asked myself why did I stay for so long and I couldn’t figure it out either) and I guess you can say that I’m tired. tired of the workload (that’s what you get when you have a bad shortage of staffs), tired of feeling tired all the darn time (imagine always having to do 12-hours shift so often, especially during night shift especially with a colleague who’s superiority meant guests > your own subordinate’s needs *not my words, but of my ex-colleagues*) if you think I didn’t put up with enough bullshit, I can assure you I performed way beyond my capabilities and I was exhausted – mentally and physically. I think I complained to my fiancΓ© all the time, and most importantly, I became unhappy. while my relationship with my colleagues were great and comforting (something I found hard to give up), I made the choice to leave simply because the only way up the career ladder is to move on

and to those who knew where I went, yes I know it’s downright hypocritical to move to your competitor but with a higher designation and pay and benefits β€” I think I’ll take my pick at where I’m at now. it might be too soon to say, but I like it here, it’s very similar in a way but yet completely different. 

I chose to resign a day before my birthday and I couldn’t be more happy! really, I had a great birthday week and I had ample time to recuperate my body! πŸ˜Žβ€‹β€‹

I’ve been surpressing this for so long but I think when a friendship/relationship dies, all you can do is to leave it alone. for good. for evil. for whatever. you get the picture yeah? I’ve reached the point where I’m okay β€” I’m okay with being on my own and it has been that way for a very long time and I have no intention of making any changes. if there’s any reason why I’m the person I am today, it’s because I’ve given way to many chances to the wrong people and I revoke it all years ago and it shocked the people around me. why wouldn’t they, anyway? therefore, I won’t have any regrets. you can stay out of my life and I’m completely fine. 

sidetrack, one month to before hitting the 150 days which means registration! I don’t know about you but we are so behind time. hahaha I should panic, I know but I’m definitely not. in fact, I am more lazy than usual. I don’t behave like someone who’s getting married. I think the child in me will forever be here (why I also don’t feel comfortable in having a child so soon after the wedding) but ah well, who really knows. I managed to book a slot for henna! well, white henna that is. not a fan of the traditional henna cause I can’t stand it πŸ˜‚

I should go to bed thou, orientation tomorrow! 

we don’t talk anymore~

#SHRMZB from K and I! ❀️ believe it or not, this year is our first year celebrating together cause we only knew each other last year hahahaha. I haven’t been blogging for a long time (more active on Snapchat thou! ID: ktyjhz) but I’ve been reading peoples’ posts of coz. 

I will jump to wedding updates shortly but OMG, I’ve been obsessed with buying new make-up especially liquid lipsticks. and my recent obsession gotta be the Jeffree Star, in the color Unicorn Blood

I am usually a mauve color person and I personally do not like the color red but PLS LOOK AT THAT SHADE? I AM DEFINITELY IN LOVE. 😭😍 but God damn it, the lipstick is so expensive, damn you international shipping!!!!! (I have since found a cheaper alternative – ezbuy if anyone wants to order from ANY USA websites! $4nett per 500G which is darn affordable!) I’m waiting for certain colors to be restocked but this is definitely worth it as it is VERY long lasting. I am this obsessed that I wanna use it everyday hahaha.

I’m still waiting for my another package of liquid lipsticks, shall try it out before giving my review! 🀘🏻

anyway, this year is my last year celebrating Syawal/Ramadhan as a single person, can’t believe that next year I will have a (very clingy) husband?! sometimes I am still in disbelieve cause who would have thought I end up getting married, hmm so much for my single life πŸ€” of coz, everything will change and more than anything, I hope to not find difficulties adapting cause my mode of solution between fight or flight has always been flight. πŸ˜• sigh! 

y’kno, people always place relationships in the same level when you’re engaged but it’s so hard. there’s no more of, “if you wanna leave, just go!” I am a very difficult person (you can ask anybody around me) and I’ve been the type of person who leave situations when I do not see myself grow anymore. but I can’t do it over and over, things will be different soon. bear in mind that we skipped dating altogether and got engaged afterwards. crazy I know but I’m crazy huh. 😬 

I had my mid-month appraisal and there were ~talks~ of people resigning and the question bounced back to me. honestly it was so hard to answer because who’s to say what my life will be like after the wedding, after settling down to my routine? I will not be staying with my parents and I have to admit that this is prolly the hardest decision I have/had to make because it’s so damn far from my work place and in the end, I know I have to choose either or. there’s no possibility that I can choose staying in this job if I’m spending quite a bit (more than 1 hour) travelling. when the day comes to an end, I’m sure I’ll be so exhausted (and very cranky). I’ll miss the convenience, trust me… 10-15 mins to city area via MRT? urgh! I hope I’ll manage to find a house soon that will match my expectations cause well, I’m the most fussy out of the both of us. haha. πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜… 

I can’t wait to get new furniture, our future room has a very odd floor plan but gotta make do~ recce IKEA few months back and I’ve a few things on my list! will prolly get all EOY and to furnish everything. not to mention I have to pack my stuffs and I really have too much clothes. planning a spree real soon!! I don’t care (much) about the money but I’m way more concerned about the space I’ll be freeing! yazzz! (also a good excuse to get new clothes that fit me better! I’ve officially grew out of my dresses and what nots because they were a part of me when I was still all girly and nowadays I’m just a laid-back person who couldn’t care less of what I’m wearing haha!) 

now finally, some wedding updates! if you guys followed my posts, you should know as of today, we have only completed three things. for people who are getting married in 7 months, we are lagging behind like crazy but we really… don’t care. πŸ˜‚ did bridal, photography and videography (solemnisation only). my aunt came over for Raya visiting and she’s a caterer (she’s been handling most if not all of my cousins’ weddings food and what nots) and somehow the theme colors have been decided. well it was more like she asked me and I just mumbled (hello I was asked on the spot!) off white and peach. if it was really up to me, I’d pick black any day, any time. HAHA the mysterious feeeeeeels though. 😎 there were talks of having a waffles + ice-cream live-station (as thou having churros ain’t enough), I really feel like my wedding will be a full blown food festival. πŸ˜’πŸ‘πŸ»  oh and yes, that’s the ONLY update I have. HAHA. maybe in a few more months time, I’ll have things to do!

we decided to head to Bali the day after the sanding for our honeymoon! we chose this destination because we both have yet been here and since this will be our first holiday together, insya’allah it’ll be good. there was a promo months ago and it was only $200/2 pax both ways! damn cheap! we have decided on the villa too but just waiting for the time to book 🀘🏻

birthday’s coming in approximately 3 weeks time but I’ve noooo idea on what to do. all I know is, I want good food and a peace of mind. 

till next time! πŸ––πŸ»

365 days. ❀️

I know, I know, I haven’t blog in months! Where did all the time go? Sighs. 

Since the last update, so much has changed. I used to be on 6-days work routine but now, it’s 5-days (but longer working hours, I’m cool with it thou)! Definitely a happy me because it means longer leave period! Because of this, I managed to count the duration I can be on leave for my wedding without having to touch ANY annual leave and it’s 18 days! I don’t know about you but I’m definitely delighted about that. Hahaha, belom kahwin dah plan leave πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ 

I also managed to head to KL for a short trip with my bestfriend (just got back yesterday). It was fun, especially surrounded with good food all day, all night! We stayed at Grand Millennium as usual *coughs*staff rate*coughs*. Got some clothing items for K also! Haha, I didn’t really get anything for myself because most of my $ went into food food food. One of the best part of the trip was using UBER, it was VERY cheap there and so convenient, I love it. Did I mention that we also tried their McDelivery? Honestly I was very tired (not that hungry) and would make do with room service but my bestfriend didn’t wanna spend so much.. (weird considering she already spent more than 100MYR for her portion of food at some restaurant πŸ˜‚) It was alright but it took forever and I just wanted to sleep lol. KL, I will be back soon ☺️

K was working the night I landed so I wasn’t expecting anything since it wasn’t the same terminal but he came just as when I landed! Like literally after I step out of the plane haha. The funny part was, I did not notice him but I notice someone standing behind me very closely and I was getting annoyed cause this someone was totally invading my personal space but it turns out to be my fiancΓ© HAHAHA lagi sikit dah nak pukol pasal diri dekat sangat!!! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ 

  
    
 
   
These are just some photos, there were more on my snapchat and my Instagram (@ktyjhz). 

Anyway, who would have thought? 365 days with K just passed by like that. Exactly a year ago, I met K for the first time and everything changed from that moment onwards. 365 days later, I’ll be his Wife. I don’t know how should I feel about it but I’ve yet to get any jitters. Wedding planning has been well, stagnant. One year left and all we’ve done is book two vendors β€” bridal and photography. While I know I/we should buckle up and get going, there are certain things that we will only do so after Raya. Right now, we’re just focusing on the little and other bigger things like β€” what rings shall we get for each other, where to go for our honeymoon, what kind of bed and furniture should we get, where do we even live at. For us, the latter seems to hold a more important priority than a wedding as we (more of I) will be hovering between two places and I’m not sure if I can make that work but insya’allah. 

So yes, another 365 days to go! ☺️

Goodbye 2015

A year ago, I was still finding myself. Hell, I was bent on running away to places in the world because I couldn’t cope being here. My feelings were everywhere and it was getting pointless. Last year I spent days and nights being awake, smoking and questioning my life questions. If I knew I end up the way I am today, would I have changed it all then? I doubt so. 

This year was eventful β€” I went to USA, travelling to Los Angeles, Las Vegas and New York City (my fav out of the lot, definitely will be coming back 😁). I met and got engaged to the kindest and selfless guy I’ve ever known, thank God. Mind you, I was the girl who contacted multiple guys on and off for YEARS and then this happened. Yes, I’m very much thankful, nevertheless. I lost a dearest friend in the process but not every lost is a loss

2016 will be a rush, no doubt, wedding plans and errands because hello ONE YEARish until I get hitched (am I for real!?). Not to mention that we’ve yet to do anything wedding related hahaha, well this will be challenge for me and K! Looking forward definitely! 😌✨

It’s so weird because before meeting K, I had plans to quit my job take time off (3-6 months) and see the world BUT obviously, that have to be put on hold, for now. The day has not yet end but someday, I know this will all make sense. 

So, say hello to 2016!